Don’t get me wrong, this is not a diatribe about the state of Christianity in Britain, others can do that as well as or better than I. No, this is different. It occurred to me that not quite 70 years ago the United Nations, under pressure from America, voted immorally and almost certainly illegally to give Zionist Jews land that belonged to Palestinian Arabs. Then, 69 years ago Zionism declared war on the indigenous Palestinian people, which was a bit naughty because they had actually started attacking, emptying and destroying villages at least four months earlier.
Since none of the international ‘big boys’ (USA, China, Russia, EU) or their minions have seemed especially troubled by immoral and illegal behaviour I thought it time for ‘evangelical christianity’ to get a piece of the action. So today I declare the independence of ‘The Christian State of Britain’.
From today Britain will be a Christian State in the same sense that Israel is a ‘Jewish State’. If they can do it, why not we? We shall benefit from their example and experience, so, our second act is to declare the First Basic Law, ‘1:Christians uniquely have the right to self-determination’.
Our Second Basic Law is an interim arrangement until such time as Christians are a majority, ‘2: Christian citizens shall have a single vote in elections. non-Christians shall be eligible to vote once Christians have achieved at least a 2/3 numerical majority. To deal with the normal problems of ‘Law and Order’ it will be necessary to enact further laws. Our Third Basic Law sets the tone, 3: the age of criminal responsibility shall be set at 18 years of age for Christians and at 12 years of age for all others’. Experience has suggested a further, related law, so this will be 3.1., ‘3.1: It shall be illegal for non-Christians to purchase knives and carry them home in public. Arrangements shall be made for security checks on knives at all kitchen outlets and non-Christian purchasers will have to arrange for their cutlery to be delivered by a registered Christian secure courier service.’
Since land is vital for any nation our Fourth Basic Law deals with that issue, ‘4: Land not already owned by Christians shall be deemed state land for all purposes. Non-Christians may occupy such land temporarily subject to any decision by local Christians’.
Whilst we are dealing with fairly mundane matters it is vital we make adequate provision for education – for Christians. Therefore, education services for Christian children shall be fully funded up to tertiary level, with exclusions for pacifists. As a sign of our christian generosity we shall fund non-Christian education services up to secondary level at 25% of the fully funded level.
Since it is certain that anti-Christian critics will be upset we declare that ‘Christian Britain’ is in a state of permanent war with whoever dares to criticize us. Anti-Nazaritism will be objected to wherever we can define it.
If you are in favour of this declaration of the ‘Christian State of Britain’, please share widely.
Signed David ben-Carter